It is amazing how easy it is to miss the mark when it comes to protecting our children
There are times when one can weary in trying to keep children set apart for a higher standard. Outside criticism can plant seeds of distruction, weakening the beautiful rose of conviction before it fully blooms. The onslaught of attacks on families of vision, wear and tear some into buying into the belief that they may be depriving their children from a perceived need.
Our children may also begin to feel sorry for themselves thinking "if only" such and such were different then they would truly be happy. We must teach our children to line their thinking with scripture and not giving in to feelings that can be fickle. We know the bible clearly states that our happiness is not external but in our relationship with Christ alone. The joy of the Lord is our strength and is long lasting~not dependent upon our outside circumstances.
It is a dangerous thing to cave in to what others think and we must be on guard of our own personal pressures that we allow in or catering to our children's whims and whines. How many times parents have paid the price for giving in, even on a small scale to these emotions.
Many times the very thing their children think they need is the cause for future stumbling and destruction to their lives
Be prayerful in everything. Consider if the ideas to make your children happy line up with scripture. If you do proceed but later find error in your decision, don't wait but quickly remedy it. Take your child out of the situation before it is too late and permanent damage is done. How many parents I have met who held steadfast to a decision only later regret not changing their minds for fear of their child's unhappiness. In the end, their sons or daughters minds were so altered that they could not win them back. In the long run the happiness they were so afraid to ruin, turned out to be a lifelong loss for all involved.
I want to encourage all parents to be steadfast and immovable. Do not let your guard down or let your children wonder away. The term parent comes from the Latin word "Parentis" and "Altor" which means protector with a father like term within its context . We do not give up that role just because our children appear capable or because of pressures beyond what we perceive could be endured. We must brave up and trust the God who gave us this high calling and commission to train "our" children.
What works for one family may not be best for yours...
Outsiders may believe they have your children's best in mind. They want to redirect your parenting to something else and try to counsel you or your children on what they think would be better. Yet deep down inside you lack peace about this counsel, for many times it is not God's plan and may be the worst direction for your family. Your child was given just for you to parent and not someone else. God places within your heart what He knows is best for your particular situation. No one else will understand like the Lord what is in the heart of your child. He gave you to be the parent to this particular one, not someone else who wasn't given the same instructions. What may seem overprotective to an outsider may be just what was needed to help your child overcome a weak area in their lives. Trust God, believe in His word and let the world teach their own children.
I have met so many individuals who want to counsel other people's children to their ideals and unresolved hang ups, only to ruin a wonderfully trained young person or weaken an already struggling youth. I caution you to be wary of outsiders. Especially as your young person gets older. Then the real trouble can begin. There are plenty who believe they are doing God's duty, wanting to take a great young man or young lady and give them advice. Many times it undermines your family values and your husbands God given direction for your family. Parents need to prepare for this and discuss this with their children to be aware of. It will save years of heartache for everyone involved. Help your children to politely walk away from counsel given from others without parents knowledge, presence, approval or does not line up with your family directives. Especially as your young person is about to graduate from home schooling, there needs to be a spiritual awareness that this is when the heaviest warfare for your children's souls can get intense. Everything may come against them in various forms to undermine years you as parents have invested.
Many home schooler's loose their integrity, strength of character and close walk with the Lord shortly after graduating. Many times after entering into the workforce or college they can easily begin compromising, become discouraged and loose heart.
A prudent man sees evil and hides himself, The naive proceed and pay the penalty.
